The past few months have been really good in a lot of ways, yet extremely challenging at the same time. Some of you have heard me share (and I think I blogged once) about my grandfather's current battle with dementia and Alzheimer's. It has been a difficult journey for my family as it seems like everything happened so quickly. With each new week comes more and more struggles for him and more choices for the family. That pattern continued this past week, as we discovered an array of additional health problems and begin preparing our final goodbyes. I spent most of Friday night awake, reflecting on my grandfather's life. He was and is such an amazing inspiration in his faith, commitment to and love for his family. I have always referred to my grandfather as my spiritual father and have drawn many of my values and spiritual beliefs from his example.
I got out of bed Saturday morning and was hit with another family blow. My 60 year old uncle had been in a car accident the night before. His condition was unknown, but it was not good. The choices he made prior to the accident were very hurtful to the family. I spent quite a bit of time reflecting on his life on Saturday as I read through Chapter 13, while allowing the questions on page 388 to guide me in exploring my life, values, and choices. I compared my grandfather's life and my uncle's life and thought about their passions and the way they spent their time on this earth. I thought about the words I say, the things I do, and what message my words and actions send to the world around me. I took the time to question what I believe and ask why I hold these beliefs. I honestly searched areas of life where I am open or closed to new ideas and identified relationships or situations where I am judgmental. It was hard to be honest with myself in those areas, but I am grateful for the opportunity to reflect and feel it is important to do so often.
As I reflected on my values and purpose, and on the lives of my grandfather and uncle, I made some decisions about things I want to continue to invest in and areas where I need to change how I spend my time. This is a topic that every person should address frequently throughout their lives. As school counselors, it could be very helpful to walk students through a process of questioning and knowing what they believe and identifying ways to live a life that truly represents that. Helping students understand their values and purpose for their lives will give them hope and meaning in both the big and small things that cross their paths. In my opinion, there is no better gift than that!
Corey, G., & Corey, M.S. (2008). I never knew I had a choice: Explorations in personal growth (9th ed.). Belmont, California: Thompson Brooks/Cole.
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