Blog 5: Stress Management!

            While reading the text this week, I reflected on the most stressful time of my life: My first year in college.  During this year, I lived in a constant state of stress.  I cannot recall taking any time for relaxation.  Many times, I only attended social events because I felt like I should.  Procrastination was also a huge component with my stress.  I remember feeling anxious that I was looking at Facebook instead of studying, but I would not change my actions.  Instead, I would stay up all night before my tests in an attempt to cram as much information into my head as possible.  I did exercise, actually over-exercised, but it was not in an attempt to decrease stress.  It was in an endeavor to control my seemingly out of control life.  Even the relationships that I did have were shallow and not ones that would allow me to be open and vulnerable.  Just as Corey and Corey (2008) described as possible, I literally made myself sick.   I had a cold for the entire winter and spring of my first year of college. 

            Upon self-reflection, I now know some ways my stress was perpetuated.  First, I was completely burnt out.  Instead of relaxing my body, I exercised more, which only amplified the burn out.  I also entered college with defensive behavior, setting myself up for failure.  I never felt smart enough to attend UVa so I always told myself that if I had not gone to a rural high school, my GPA would have been lower and I would never have been accepted.  I used humor to describe my situation, but it was self-deprecating.  In discussions, I chose to stay silent because I had decided that I was not intelligent enough to offer any ideas of substance.  The negative thoughts that I allowed to enter my head did not translate into motivation.  They kept me stuck in a constant state of stress and depression. 

            Throughout the past seven years, I have developed healthier ways of managing my stress.  My time management stills improved my last two years of college and are mostly adequate now.  I rarely procrastinate because I know that in order to spend time with my friends and boyfriend, I must complete my work early.  Running is now an activity that I do for fun and as a stress reliever and not one that I put pressure on myself to do every day.  I also allow a few distractions, such as watching a favorite TV show.  There are also many more stress-managing skills that I want to incorporate into my life such as practicing mindfulness, learning to rely more on others for support and practicing relaxation techniques.  This winter is my first one since High School that I have not even caught a cold (knock on wood) and I am hoping to continue the trend.  As a counselor, I hope to prevent similar stressful college situations with my students.

Corey, G., & Corey, M.S. (2008). I never knew I had a choice: Explorations in personal growth (9^th ed.). Belmont, California: Thompson Brooks/Cole. ISBN: 9780495602293.