Blog 7

I think that communication is one of the most important things that a relationship needs to have to be a healthy one.  With that, the communication needs to be open and honest so that the relationship can grow and flourish.  Corey and Corey (2008) describe that many relationship problems comes from misunderstanding and not having enough communication.  I have had problems in my past with my last girlfriend four years ago with communication and is why we broke up.  Now that I have gone through college and learned about how communication is really important I know that I need to share my feelings and what I am think in my relationships. This is important because I know that they cannot read my mind.  Today, I think of myself as having good communication.  An example of this is I was trying to be in a relationship with this one girl that I dated in high school that I really liked and still do.  I started talking and hanging out with her again and I gave her more of what I was thinking and feeling.  She was the girl I had a hard time communicating my feelings to and that is one of the reasons we broke up.  However, now I feel that I have grown and matured so that I can communicate better by listening and expressing my feelings.   I also think that it is important to have good communication in all of the relationships and not just the romantic ones.  Communication is going to be very important in my school counseling career because there is so much that you have to communicate to the whole school.  One needs to have good communication skills in order to help your clients as well.

Going along with the Schmookler and Bursik (2007) article, I think that it is really important to have monogamous relationships.  I have strong Christian values and I believe that you should be with your one significant other.  I can understand that people believe in having more than one partner and that is their choice but I feel that if you are in a committed relationship that you should not cheat on the other person.  There are so many people who are doing that today.  One was my father.  My Dad cheated on my Mom when I was younger and I have no idea why and a part of me does not want to know.  Overall, I think that monogamy is really important to keep if that is what you believe in.  Knowing this knowledge, I will have to keep my beliefs to myself when a student comes to me saying they have multiple dating partners.  I know everyone is different and I can respect that.  I know now that I will have to be actively aware when this situation comes to my desk.

Corey, G., & Corey, M.S. (2008). I never knew I had a choice: Explorations in personal growth. (9^th ed.). Belmont, California: Thompson Brooks/Cole.

Schmookler, T. & Bursik, K. (2007). The value of monogamy in emerging adulthood: A gendered perspective. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 24, 819–835. DOI: 10.1177/0265407507084185