Week 11

I believe loneliness and solitude are often mistaken as synonyms.  Many people believe the two words are interchangeable and that if someone is alone, they must be lonely.  I have always enjoyed my time to myself and have always needed that time for solitude.  However, those around me have not always understood why I would want to be alone.  My two closest friends are the exact opposite.  They seek company for all activities.  They want to eat, shop, exercise, run errands, and watch tv with someone else.  In the past, they would become very confused and upset with me when I would decline their offer to do things like go shopping.  Shopping is one of my all time favorite activities to do alone.  I love to just wander around looking at things in silence and at my own pace.  Maybe this explains my shopping problem!  Over time though, my friends and family have developed an understanding of my desire and appreciation for solitude.  

There was a place in the chapter that prompted us to reflect on loneliness during our childhood.  I could not seem to recall a time when I felt lonely or an experience that has stayed with me. My sister and I are only 18 months apart, and this has allowed us to create a bond greater than any other I could imagine having.  We always had each other growing up and even though we are not always in the same town, we both know we still have each other today.  I think our mom was always there to prevent loneliness as well.  As I think back on times where I may have experienced transient loneliness with no plans for the weekend, my mom would always make it a point to swoop in.  

I was very intrigued by the article about forgiveness, because this year I have needed to forgive somebody for something, that at times, I wasn’t sure was forgivable.  Although it has taken me months, I can say that I have truly forgiven this person.  I can agree with the article that empathy plays a large role in forgiveness.  Trying to understand what that other person was thinking or experiencing allows a person to realize someone’s actions may not have occurred with the intent to hurt you.  I appreciated the part in the Hodgson and Wertheim (2007) article that stated, “While forgiveness of others is distinct from reconciliation and may not necessarily lead to resuming a relationship,it can be argued that forgiveness can lay the groundwork for reconciliation.” Sometimes forgiveness can lead to reconciliation, and other times it is the only way we can truly move on from something.

Corey, G. , & Corey, M.S. (2008). I never knew I had a choice: Explorations in personal growth (9th ed.). Belmont, California: Thompson Brooks/Cole. ISBN: 9780495602293.

Hodgson, L.K., & Wertheim, E.L. (2007). Does good emotion management aid forgiving? Multiple dimensions of empathy, emotion management and forgiveness of self and others. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships 24; 931-949.